depression

A ‘disaster’ waiting to happen

I suppose it was inevitable.

Yesterday, Ontario Premier Doug Ford announced that most of the province would enter the third phase of reopening after the COVID-19 pandemic hit. We’re not out of the woods yet when it comes to the virus, but the number of cases in Ontario is low enough to warrant this.

The part of this phase of reopening that bothers me is that casinos in most of the province will be back in business as of Friday. Considering my history with slot machines, this is troublesome to me.

More than three years ago, I self-excluded myself from not only the slots facility in Woodstock, Ontario but from all casinos in the province. It was one of the best things I ever did.

Talking to my wife about the situation last night, she noted that before the self-exclusion we were constantly in overdraft and other forms of debt. Since I took the step to step away from the slots, we’ve never been in overdraft and the only debt we have is our mortgage.

Gambling, and the slots in particular, can lead to such things as depression, divorce, bankruptcy, and even suicide. But those issues don’t stop governments here and around the world from raking in the bucks from slots – indeed, they are a multi-billion-dollar business globally.

Even so, reopening the casinos in Ontario now is a “disaster” waiting to happen, she said. With slots players coming off a months-long hiatus from gambling, they just might flock to casinos in record numbers and spend cash they can ill afford to part with.

I suppose it was inevitable. However, I can’t help but think that many people would have been better off if the slots were off-limits indefinitely.

On gambling, three years later

I continue to keep my promise to my wife when it comes to gambling. Today marks three years to the day that I self-excluded myself from the slots facility in Woodstock, Ontario. It’s made a world of difference to us financially, not to mention the positive impact it has had on our relationship.

I have to admit, I have considered – from time to time – writing the slots folks a letter to get myself reinstated as a gambler at the facility (although, at this time, the matter has been taken out of my hands as all OLG casinos in Ontario have been closed by the coronavirus). But these reinstatement thoughts are fleeting at best and I keep reminding myself how much better life is without the slots. At these times, I occasionally turn to YouTube slots videos – among them, those produced by Slotlady and NG Slot. Watching these videos is something of an interesting exercise … I get the chance to ‘play along’ with them without spending a dime.

However, when these people lose their money I am reminded of how depressing slots play can be. It’s at times like this that I turn my attention to something else, like writing or lifting weights. Such pursuits are hugely favourable compared to falling into the gambling trap once again.

Staying away from the slots is definitely worth it. And there is hope for people still caught in the gambling grip.

ConnexOntario is one such avenue of hope for people with a gambling or mental health problem. It’s toll-free, anonymous and open 24 hours a day year-round. You can call 1-866-531-2600 to get on your anti-gambling way.

On hypomania

As I write this, I’m a bit hypomanic (which is defined by some as ‘under’ manic or less than fully manic). Mania is like an unwelcome old friend to me… I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder back in 1998 and had plenty of manic episodes in the years that followed (although I haven’t had a fully manic episode in a decade).

This bout of hypomania (which includes such signs as anxiety, accelerated speech and somewhat disorganized thoughts) comes after at least half a dozen things converged in my professional and personal life. It began, I believe, at a low rev back in the fall when my sister had a stroke. Things just piled on from there without me fully realizing it (although, looking back, the signs were there along the way). The high point hit around the Christmas holidays and I am now on the ‘down slope’ of hypomania.

This time around, I compiled a list of things that I am striving to do to “get over the bipolar (or, more to the point in my case, hypomania) hump.” You can consider it a primer for somebody newly diagnosed with bipolar… I wish somebody had handed me the following list back in 1998. It would have made the following years go more smoothly.

  • Sleep (as much as possible for mania, try not to overdo if you’re prone to depression)
  • Carry on with medications
  • Take break from stressful work situations (as much as possible)
  • Exercise
  • Nutrition (with focus on such things as nutritious vegetables)
  • Don’t go over the top on social media
  • Keep healthy distance from overtaxing friends and relatives (although continue to be supportive from a distance… phone calls are best)
  • Keep lines of communication open with supportive friends and relatives (and listen to them if they are pointing out you might be in mania or depression)
  • Don’t do illegal drugs (or legal ones that aren’t prescribed)
  • Limit alcohol (or opt to cut out entirely)
  • Limit caffeine
  • Drink lots of water

No doubt everyone who has been through the ropes of bipolar has a list of their own. For those of you out there new to the illness, I hope this helps. Good luck to you.

Hi, I’m manic. She’s depressive.

For the past few weeks, my sister has been in hospital after suffering a stroke. The initial news seemed to get worse day by day – the doctors then found a blood clot in her lung, then multiple blood clots and, ultimately, a hole in her heart (which I later learned isn’t as uncommon as I first believed). The medical staff at the hospital has been challenged by the dual issues of the stroke, which affected my sister’s speech, and the blood clots. The treatment has been progressing.

My sister and I, in past years, have both been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, although our issues with the illness have literally been at opposite ends of the spectrum. I have been more on the manic end of things (although I believe I have been blessed in that I have gone a medicated-assisted decade without a manic episode). As for my sister, she is more on the depressive end and has not had the luck I have had in finding the right mix of meds. On a too-frequent basis, she goes into a depression. These agonizing depressions can last as long as 13 months.

She was in a depression since June of this year and she admitted that, aside from dragging herself through her work responsibilities, all she wanted to do was sit on her couch and watch television. I firmly think her more recent health concerns stem from her depression and resulting months-long inactivity. Indeed, from what I’ve read in the past few days, lack of exercise can lead to such health woes.

I’m not saying being either manic or depressive is either better or worse than the other. Each condition comes with its own set of challenges… being without both would be best. But it’s not like we have a choice.

Bipolar milestones

I was watching a video on Youtube about bipolar disorder and it got me thinking about how fortunate I am about my own bipolar situation. It’s been 20 years since I was diagnosed with the disorder and this year marks a decade since I’ve had a manic or depressive episode. I’ve had hurdles along the way, no doubt – I’ve lost jobs over the years and some friendships have been strained (to say the least). But I’m pleasantly employed in a variety of part-time gigs these days, my friendships are stronger than ever and I’m happily married – this, despite at least one person cautioning my wife to think twice before marrying somebody with the disorder.

One of the hurdles I – and many people on psychiatric medications – face is weight gain. I’ve always had a tough time with my weight but it ballooned after starting on meds. At my high point I was 400 pounds, but thanks to a variety of eating lifestyles – currently I’m on the ketogenic lifestyle coupled with intermittent fasting – I was down to 284.3 pounds at my last weigh-in. I continue to aim for 240 pounds or lower.

And, thanks to my condition, I was able to write a bipolar book published by the Oxford County branch of the Canadian Mental Health Association. One lady at my church, after recently reading my book, said: “You went through hell.” Maybe. But as one chaplain friend of mine likes to say, if you’re going through hell, keep going. Believe me, there’s light at the end of the bipolar tunnel. If you’re newly diagnosed and are having a tough time, my advice to you is simply this… persevere.

County council backs poverty elimination

County of Oxford Council (in Ontario, Canada) has voted to eradicate poverty within the municipality’s borders.

However, just how that will play out remains to be seen.

“We don’t have a definite plan,” Peter Crockett, county CAO/clerk, told Oxford councillors before the vote at council’s Nov. 22 meeting. Rather, citing various leaps of faith council had made previously regarding such things as aiming for a zero target for waste in Oxford, Crockett asked council to make another such leap.

Something is certain: Cutting poverty to nil in the county won’t happen quickly. In addition, it could involve various levels of government.

“It will not happen overnight. It will happen incrementally,” Crockett said, adding other support programs for people in poverty are mere band-aids.

“It (eliminating poverty) is possible and it’s the right thing to do.

“It’s about the well-being of our community,” Crockett said.

The council vote comes on the heels of a two-day event in September, organized by Operation Sharing, that included a town hall meeting and subsequent gathering of local leaders. That gathering led to the formation of the Zero Poverty Oxford Action Committee and a joint declaration against poverty. The declaration is as follows:

“Reducing poverty in Oxford County is the right thing to do. Through leadership, innovation and transformed relationships, by working to eliminate poverty, Oxford County will achieve health, wellbeing and prosperity gains, and be a stronger community for all.”

Council voted to support that declaration in addition to its zero poverty in Oxford move. In addition, it directed county staff to work in consultation with the committee to come up with a draft Zero Poverty Oxford strategy.

Crockett said the aim would not be to provide people in poverty with lavish living. Rather, the goal would be to provide “reasonable lifestyles.” Such things as housing and transportation are other issues that would need to be addressed.

A delegation representing the committee outlined the need for an anti-poverty strategy to council.

Delegation member Dr. Tracy Smith-Carrier, professor and researcher at King’s College – University of Western Ontario in the department of social work, said “eliminating poverty is doable.”

“Poverty is expensive,” she said, remarking that increased health and social costs come as part of the price tag, in addition to issues of suicide ideation. Also, generally, 70 per cent of the people in poverty are working, sometimes juggling three to four jobs.

And council heard that 61 per cent of those in poverty in the county are working.

Coun. Deb Tait asked if there is a program to teach cooking to help those in poverty.

“There’s never been a food program that eliminated poverty,” Smith-Carrier replied. A food-based approach will never solve poverty, she added.

Vanessa Giuliano of Operation Sharing, and a member of the delegation, said the aim is to give people in poverty more money so they can buy more food.

In September’s town hall meeting, renowned researcher Dr. Lynn McIntyre pegged the guaranteed annual income a person in poverty should receive at $16,850.